You Might Be a Redneck Jedi If
- Your Jedi robe is a Camouflage color.
- You have ever used your Light Saber to open a bottle of Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill.
- You think the best use of your light saber is picking your teeth.
- At least one wing of your X-Wing is primer colored.
- There is a blaster rack in the back of your landspeeder.
- You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.
- You can find no grammatical errors in the way Yoda talks.
- You think that the Stormtroopers Elite Guards are just KKK members with really good sheets.
- A peaceful meditation session is one without gas.
- You can levitate yourself using a force from within, but not The Force.
- Your master ever said "My finger you will pull..hmmm?"
- You have ever had an X-wing up on blocks in your yard.
- You ever lost a hand during a light-saber fight because you had to spit.
- You have bantha horns on the front of your landspeeder.
- The worst part of spending time on Dagoba is the dadgum skeeters.
- Wookies are offended by your B.O.
- You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.
- You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing/bowling.
- You have ever used a light-sabre to clean fish or open a non-twist-off bottle of beer.
- Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over t' the dark side...it'll be a hoot."
- You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the bar-b-q grill to light.
Posted October 19, 2009 6:00 AM
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