Will I Live to See 80?
The last time I ran a health joke, a buddy wrote to say he was catching up on e-mail as he walked on his treadmill -- and was so dejected at the first paragraph that he sent me a one word reply: "Sigh."
With that, let me bum my friend out just a bit more!
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I recently picked a new primary care doctor. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age.
A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, "Do you think I'll live to be 80?"
He asked, "Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer or wine?"
"Oh no," I replied. "I'm not doing drugs, either!"
Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?"
I said, "No, my former doctor said that all red meat is very unhealthy!"
"Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, sailing, hiking, or bicycling?"
"No, I don't," I said.
He asked, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?"
"No," I said. "I don't do any of those things."
He looked at me and said, "Then, why the hell do you want to live another 20 years?"
Posted November 24, 2008