The Wall on the Border
One of the columnists I read is "Chief Copyboy" Charles Stough, who writes a weekly-ish missive for the ink-stained wretches in the newspaper business, which he calls "The Burned-Out Newspapercreatures Guild". I've been reading it for a ridiculous number of years.
Chas "retired" from his Dayton, Ohio, newspaper gig and moved to San Antonio, Texas. He didn't last long there -- culture shock forced a retreat to Dayton, where presumably he's resting easier now. Through thick and thin, with some time off here and there, he's kept his "BONG" column going. In his 7 September 2006 missive he suggests where the government might want to install that wall, which most have suggested be built between the U.S. and Mexico.
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Where To Put The Big Wallby Charles Stough
It had to happen that BONG eventually would join the immigration controversy, that phony issue that displaced gay marriage and flag burning to get out the base. The Security Issues and Jobsite Purity Committee has rendered its recommendation that we don't build a huge wall along the Mexican border. Build it on the Texas state line. Keeping Texans out of the United States is a better idea because:
For the above reasons, plus the fact that American jobs are threatened much more by India, Malaysia and China than by any Hispanic country, the committee favors an impenetrable wall at the Texas state line. This guarantees approval by New Mexico, Oklahoma and Louisiana. (Sorry, Mexico, you'll have to build your own.) Editorial writers please copy.
© 2006 The Burned-Out Newspapercreatures Guild -- reprinted by the demand of the last sentence.
Posted September 11, 2006
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