The Homosexual Agenda

Surely you've heard of the "Homosexual Agenda" over the years. Yet no one has actually seen the Agenda ...until now. After months of undercover work, I have been able to obtain a copy of the actual Homosexual Agenda directly from the Head Homosexual!

6:00 am - Gym
8:00 am - Breakfast (oatmeal and egg whites)
9:00 am - Hair appointment
10:00 am - Shopping
12:00 pm - Brunch

2:00 pm
1) Assume complete control of the U.S. Federal, State and Local Governments as well as all other national governments
2) Recruit all straight youngsters to our debauched lifestyle
3) Destroy all healthy heterosexual marriages
4) Replace all school counselors in grades K-12 with agents of Colombian and Jamaican drug cartels
5) Establish planetary chain of "homo breeding gulags" where over-medicated imprisoned straight women are turned into artificially impregnated baby factories to produce prepubescent love slaves for our devotedly pederastic gay leadership
6) bulldoze all houses of worship, and
7) Secure total control of the Internet and all mass media for the exclusive use of child pornographers.

2:30 pm - Get forty winks of beauty rest to prevent facial wrinkles from stress of world conquest
4:00 pm - Cocktails
6:00 pm - Light Dinner (soup, salad, Chardonnay)
8:00 pm - Theater
11:00 pm - Bed (du jour)?

I'm starting to regret taking afternoon naps while undercover -- I apparently missed a lot of planning meetings!

Posted February 29, 2012

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