Modernizing the Church

The elderly priest, speaking to the younger priest, said, "It was a good idea to replace the first four rows of pews with plush bucket theater seats. It worked like a charm. The front of the church always fills first now."

The young priest nodded, and the old priest continued, "And you told me a little more beat to the music would bring young people back to the church, so I supported you when you brought in that rock 'n roll gospel choir. We are packed to the balcony!!"

"Thank you, Father," answered the young priest. "I'm pleased that you are open to the new ideas of youth." But then the young priest could tell that his senior partner had a reservation.

"Is there a problem?" he asked.

"Yes," said the elderly priest. "I'm afraid you've gone too far with the drive-through confessional."

"But, Father," protested the young priest, "both confessions and the contributions in the collection plate have nearly doubled since we began that!"

"I know, son, but that flashing neon sign -- "Toot 'n Tell or Go To Hell" -- just can't stay on the church roof!"

Posted May 1, 2006

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