He Said ... She Said

She said: What do you mean by coming home half drunk? ... He said: It's not my fault! I ran out of money!

He said: I don't know why you wear a bra, you've got nothing to put in it. ... She said: You wear briefs, don't you?

He said: Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way. ... She said: Well, you succeeded.

He said: Two inches more, and I would be king. ... She said: Two inches less, and you'd be queen.

On wall in ladies room: "My husband follows me everywhere." ... Written just below it: "I do not!"

He said: Shall we exchange positions tonight? ... She said: That's a good idea, you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart.

He said: How about a quickie? ... She said: As opposed to what?

Priest said: I don't think you will ever find another man like your late husband. ... She said: Who's gonna look?

He said: What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? ... She said: Turn sideways and look in the mirror.

He said: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. ... She said: OK, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.

He said: Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm? ... She said: I would, but you're never there.

Posted May 5, 2014

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