Carly Fiorina in Heaven
Hewlett-Packard CEO Carly Fiorina dies, and amazingly enough she gets to go to Heaven.
"Congratulations and welcome to Heaven," the Guardian says. "Go down the corridor, first door on your right."
Carly walks to the door, pushes it open... and staggers back. Through the flames and behind the door, all you can see are countless devils inflicting the most horrible tortures to screaming souls.
She rushes back to the Guardian and waves her Heaven Admission Pass, breathless. "There must be an error!" she says. I was supposed to be admitted to Heaven! That place looks like hell!"
"Yeah, you're in the right place," he says, rolling his eyes. "We recently merged."
Posted February 11, 2005